Encompassing Volens et Valens

Encompassing Volens et Valens

by Cassandra and the Marsh Family

For the Grad Class of '09, reality is kicking in... we're almost done high school. Some are thrilled to be departing from the “little school that could” while others fret that moment. For a long time now, I've been looking forward to finally getting out of St. Pats. However, recent events brought it all into prospective. On the morning of Thursday March 12^th, at 92 years, my Grandmother (Nana), or better known as Marian Harrison, passed onto a Better World.

77 years ago, Nana graduated from St. Patrick Regional (Class of 1932). Sadly, during my time with Nana she hadn't always been with reality, so I never heard much about her high school ventures. But my mother, Aunts and Uncles were always proud that my brothers and I attended the same school that our grandmother had. In fact, local Catholic schools run in the family blood.

Our Grandfather (Papa) was a Vancouver College graduate, our Aunts and Uncles attended St. Pats, VC, LFA, and Sacred Heart (now St. Georges). Our older cousins have graduated from VC, LFA and St. Pats.

It is amazing to see how generation after generation, St. Pats endures as a powerful school with a family-feel, influential graduates, a loving community, and alumni that return as teachers. We dominate in volleyball, and our choral program is superb, our academics our great, and our teachers, amazing, but why? It's because we do our best to live by the school motto: “Volens et Valens” which, we all (should) know means “Ready and Willing.”

Nana was a “Ready and Willing” woman. My grandparents' marriage was an example to all. Before Papa passed away in 2003, they were married for 57 years, (Grads, that's more than 3 times our current age) and I can imagine that takes some work. Nana was the mother of nine children (4 girls and 5 boys), grandmother to 14 grandchildren, and great-grandmother to 4 children. She was an amazing cook and was a natural, gracious host. Nana always had time for everyone, a quality that most of us lack.

Nana loved the beautiful things in life; literature, night skies, music and hockey. Ever since before I was born, Nana had been in a wheel chair, and was legally blind for most of our time together, and yet, despite this, she was always joyful. She was always cracking jokes with my Mom, and my Mom and Nana would tease each other. She was gentle and light-hearted, and always seemed pleased to have company. She was a true Christian example, a loving grandmother, a kind soul, a true St. Patrick.

We love you Nana!

How Will We Conquer the Violence?

It doesn't take a genius to figure out that there's this violence epidemic going down lately. There's shootings and murders left and right. It's all over the newspapers, the news, the radio, everywhere. And when a kid get beat up at my school, I know that it's all gone way to far.

So why violence? Is it the gratification of the physical release, the joy of causing pain, the power, the pleasure? Sure, it's a mix. But I think it mostly about the power. Violent people want to dominate. They want to prove their the best, and that they can take anyone. Their egos are fantastically large, but only because that's what they can hide behind. Someone who is violent or abusive definitely can't have a shred of humility.

Where are all the meek, peace-loving people? What happened to showing love and respect? The notorious UN gang had a moto of something like "honor, loyalty and respect", but how is getting into massive fights with the HAs any sort of illustration of such things. And UN? You're kidding me. Every heard of Human Rights? Yeah, the United Nations is big on that, and you know what? Gang philosophy= completely contradictory. The fact is, it seems now that even people to whom such virtues as respect are important are still people who lust for violence.

What's wrong with abuse and violence?

Everything. Sure, we human beings are biologically made to protect ourselves. We are equipped with the ability to use our muscles for self-defence. We have "fight or flight" abilities. But let's face it, civilization has come a long way. We will rarely be in a situation where we have to back to basic instincts for legitamate fear-of-life. I don't know about everyone else, but violence makes me sick. It makes me uneasy. It is not pleasing to the mind, pleasing to the senses, pleasing to the body. Even the thought of it upsets me. When I discovered that such incredible violence existed at my own school, only a couple of weeks after facilitating an Anti-Violence workshop, I didn't feel a brief bought of sadness for the abused, I felt a heavy heart for days. I went to a friends birthday party, and still felt a sadness for what had happened. Violence is unpleasureable in anyway you spell it out. There is no rebuking that. It's evident that it is an ugly act, that comes from a need for power.

When you hurt someone, especially someone who is vulnerable, you are doing it because you want to show them who is boss. You want to yell out to the world "Don't mess with me, I'll beat your ass, I'm rough and tough and I've got no weakness." But is that true? I don't think so. I think violence is a form of weakness. Abusing someone shows the ultimate truth: you're trying to protect yourself from getting hurt in any way. Tough guys, aren't so tough. Gossips are just insecure little girls. No one who hurts others is a strong person. The paradox is, they're the weakest ones out there.

Violence is on the rise and it's effecting all of us. There are shootings and killings that you hear about incessantly, sure. And if you're not involved in gangs, you may figure your okay (actually, my friend's mom apparently knew one guy who had been killed in Surrey a few weeks ago, so close to home, hey?). But for those of you who assume they're unaffected, you're wrong:

Violence is physical, sexual, verbal, economic and more. You can be abusive and never touch anyone. They say that the worst form of abuse is verbal, because when you tell someone something enough, they're going to believe. Remember how you were taught to be careful with your words? That was for a reason. People who are physically abused are affected incredibly psychologically. They suffer from very low self-esteem and truly believe that they are worth nothing.

Bottom line, violence exists more and more in our everyday lives
And we need to stop it.

Make sure that you squash violent actions and words in your own life, your own actions. Stop putting people down, and start encouraging them. Accept differences and encourage them. Stand up for what you think is right, and for the right ideals. Don't put up with rude comments towards anyone.

Discourage violent video games and other medias that encourage violence. I don't care what you say about that sort of stuff being fine and acceptable and beneficial for hand-eye coordination. You can get better hand-eye coordination by playing Mario Kart. Violent media affects the perception of violence and labels violent actions as acceptable, because what the heck, if you get killed, you'll just come back to life anyway, right?

Monitor the violence in your life, and lead a gentle life, where you lift everyone up, and protect them from hurt.

And maybe we'll get somewhere.

I'm like a Nomad

[Written February 20th]

There's certain things you fight for in life. A man's love, isn't one that I've ever fought for. Sure, that sounds like some cocky comment now, but that's not what I mean. I mean that I'm passive, I'm loving, and if you want him, you get him, no questions asked. He doesn't want me, and that's all good. It's his choice. I don't want a false love, and I don't want some that blood or tears or whatever was shed or lost over. I just want what is perfect and pure. But now I am referring to myself as a nomad. A lone wanderer, with no specific place of residence, no specific male to love. Because they're all gone. There's none for me. I am a lone wolf, prowling and howling, in vain. Because the search goes unsuccessful. I want to give up. To turn away. But I can't, everything that is within me, my biological make, it thrusts forward in a never ending self-affliction. No man should get my heart and yet, all I want to do is give it away.

Love, the Nomad.